Is being black becoming that scary?

Yesterday, I wrote a post on the fact that Black Live did matter and most importantly that it should matter for black people all around the world. I just had the feeling it was not clear enough: Black Live Matters and UNITY is critical

Black Lives So Matter. Credits:

I am appalled when going through my News Feeds on Facebook. Indeed, I  can see that  most people mentioning or commenting the AltonSterling’s case are either living in the United States or in Europe. Is it to say, Africans don’t care about what happens to their fellow black man in another country? That is one aspect.

The other aspect, is really since when being a black man became so scary? I have friends living in the United States since years and I can’t feel anything but fear now. Yes, I am afraid, one day, one of those names, one of those useless victims of cobs racism, one of these victims will be a friend of mine. 

I knew the United States were full of dichotomy. I knew this was one of the countries in the world where despite everything racism against black people was still very high. But to this extent? I have watched the abstract of the video and NO, NO, NO, a 32-years old man can’t just die this way in the United States in 2016, with Barack Hussein OBAMA, as a president on top of it.

Where did the dream of Martin Luther King go? Did it ever come through in fact? For once, I am writing with real vivid emotion. I feel pain. I feel anger. I feel something in my stomach that I just can’t describe. I feel like I will never visit the United States, I don’t want to die.

But more importantly, I feel it is not just the United States. In France, somehow it is the same. The violence is maybe less visible but the absurdity and the lack of respect is just the same. Just watch those white, those French here in Cameroon, acting as the place was just theirs.

I think I will stop here. I think I will stop here because If i continue writing, I may end up calling for violence too. I may end up calling some other race names, and it does not serve the cause. I am here in Cameroon, watching those images from the United States, and I feel helpless.

I am here in Cameroon, reading most status in my Facebook news feed just talking about a stupid football match, France vs. Germany, World War brought back to football. And then so what? Football is definitely the opium of the world. It is amazing, it is just amazing…

I can’t continue, my heart is sinking. I think about Mr Sterling’s child that watched his father killed right in front of him. And seriously have you seen that video? It just reminds me of times when segregation in the United States or in South Africa was at his highest. It reminds me of movies like Sarafina and the tears I shred when watching them. It reminds me of  the movies Kunta Kinte, Amistad, A Cry for Freedom or Lumumba (or even worse, that article I read on Lumumba and the Belgium guy who cut his body in pieces and is still alive, not convicted and being given the opportunity to tell his story openly)  and I could mention so many others. It reminds me of the worse moments in black history all around the world.

Does it feel normal to you? I repeat, does it feel normal. For once, I feel writing is just pointless. What would it change? What would it change to write it out loud and say “STOP IT”. When will it ever stop? Since when, since when, did being black became so scary?

RIP Alton Sterling. I just can’t imagine the pain of his family. I just hope and pray, this time around, for this 114th black victim of cobs in 2016, I just hope justice will be done.

I am out!

Love, Anna♦

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