That day you realise, you are more of the quiet type

I am a big idealist, sometimes over-optimistic about life, the world and with a strong will to help others around me. Still, I just realized recently (in fact a few minutes ago), that I am more of the quiet type. This sentence in the whole may seem to mean nothing, but for me, it means everything.

Have you ever seen those people in a group that are the most seen? Each time, they integrate a project, they become the leading hand, the voice of it all even though sometimes (and sometimes only) there are not the ones achieving the most of it. In the project, you would have some other persons, who can eventually be the lead or not, but don’t seem to be. They would coordinate, follow-up, ensure things are rightly done but are not interested in recognition, awards, and would even tend to minimize the work achieved by themselves. 

I just realized a few minutes ago as I was mentioning that I am more of that type and it could be a real challenge for my upcoming projects. Indeed, imagine you are working on a charity project, or more simple, a blog, an activity that needs to gain visibility. In my case, I have this blog on African culture since three years called “La Bibliothèque Qui Ne Brûle Pas”. In several instances, I have seen people surprised to discover I was the person behind the blog. Indeed, in standard discussions with people that I interact with, I will always mention my blogs. Meanwhile, on the blog itself, or in any platform where I could gain traction for it (Bloggers Meet Up,  Facebook groups, Twitter accounts), I finally remain very shy. I don’t attend public events that could help me have more visibility. I don’t communicate on the projects for the blog. I do the things small and steady, and though it is difficult to admit, finally it does not disturbs me that much.

I just realized few minutes ago, that I have indeed some great ambitions but if those ambitions demand too much of me, in that sense that I have to “show off”, I would rather shy away from them. So yeah, I am more of the quiet type and this is definitely a barrier for some of my ambitions. What is even more challenging is, I don’t believe this tendency will be easy to break. Maybe, writing this post could be considered as a first step, I really don’t know but what I am sure about is, this is an easy step. I mean, I am just here behind a computer, no picture, no real risk taken. Many of you reading me, don’t know me and the audience of this blog remains as from now very limited. I am not sure I will have more than 30 views on this post, so I am taking no risk in telling you I am shy, or introvert or any other way this can be expressed.

Meanwhile, I am very much conscious of the fact that I will need to change this. In order to achieve the projects I have and especially for those where I want to act for others, I will have to abandon a little bit of my shyness and stand to go out there. I don’t really know how I will achieve it and I believe, this is also one of the reasons I am slowing down some projects. Still, I will have no choice but to find the solution. Hiding behind my computer, behind my e-mails, this will not serve me.

Writing this post, just reminds me of the first day I told my mother I wanted to work in the business world and especially in either commercial side or marketing. She just told me “my child, you are too introvert, always in your books, always in your planet, you can’t make it”. And I did make it. I just ended six years as brand manager. I have trained thousands of brand girls, did presentation in front of exec boards, senior managers and a great deal of customers and consumers. I went on TV seldom times and acted as MC. But, at the time I was paid for it, suppose it was therefore easy.

The time has come for me to open up, to put the same energy and daring spirit for projects that I dear to my heart. And somehow, I am very proud of this post and the adventure on this blog. I write about ‘personal stuff’, I open up to some of my flaws and right now, I just told you I was more of an introvert person. I hope I will be able in a few months or few years to write about some of my initiatives and how far I brought them. It is not going to be easy at all. Still, I tend to be optimistic as I mentioned in introduction. So, hopefully, I shall overcome.

If you have some tips to make it happen, feel free. If  like me you are more of the quiet type as far as branding yourself is concerned, just let me know your thoughts in the comments. Anyway, it was fun sharing.

Love, Anna♦

PS: I just discovered this post, that fully describes me and the enigma I am facing. Just read: 19 Struggles of Having an outgoing personality but actually being introvert.

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